Summary

The author, a science journalist and a bereaved mother, interviews parents of teenage and young adult children who died at least five years before. The focus of the book is on the long term, large scale effects of the death and how parents move through their grief.

Quotes

"The pain of grief is just as much a part of life as the joy of love: it is perhaps the price we pay for love."

General Themes

Parental bereavement is a permanent condition. Some of the questions considered are: How do parents react to the death of a child? How do they find meaning in their lives? How do their lives change? How do parents bond or find a connection with their dead child? What is the effect on their marriage and relationships with the surviving children? What is the meaning of recovery?

What the Reviewer Liked

I appreciated the honesty and deep emotional content of the interviews. The stories validated my own emotions after the death of my son. The author portrayed a strong identity of each parent. There was an emphasis on the differences between men and women and their styles of grieving. Parents learned to live with their pain in a way that honored their children. I have read this book several times and it continues to be a resource in understanding my own grief issues and those of my clients.

Shortcomings or Flaws

None.

Writing Style

The book consists of a series of interviews with bereaved mothers and fathers. The interviews alternate with chapters on subjects related to grief. The writing is clear and compact.

Author Qualifications

The author is a bereaved mother and journalist.

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Kara is the Gothic root of the word "care."
It means to reach out, to care, to lament, to grieve with.